Monday, May 4, 2009

Time to say Goodbye

1st of May, a saddening news struck my family and me far too painfully. Heart sank. Gonggong'd gone, it meant for ever this time, he would never come back to us again. Yet I hope it is only a convincing dream that all of us confused with the reality. Was it because gonggong was a kind person that the Lord wanted to take him Home???

It was only two weeks ago I went back to Kota Bharu where my's mommy hometown is, to visit gonggong with my family. He had been admitted into the hospital since March, he was diagnosed for having a severe COPD. We knew well his condition wasn't good because he went to hospital for this few years on and off but I didn't expect it as a last visit, I could hardly to imagine the next time we go back without seeing gonggong sitting at the living room waiting for our arrival.

Due to the far distance we parted, we're managed to meet him only in the long holiday in Dec if he didn't come to our place. When I was small, I was always waiting in anticipation to go back to KB not because of I can get a flight over there of course, if we went there by car, I was still willing to follow although the journey took 8-9 hours long.

He was indeed a kindhearted and hardworking person. He always thought of others first before himself. He had a hard life, with the little money he could spare, he lent to his friends or anyone he knew who were in need without expect anything back. At the age of sixties, he's still working, as long as he was able to work, he didn't want to do nothing at home.

That time, I mean while he was still healthy, he would walk us to the nearest grocery shop every evening to buy me and my sister some 'san cha'- a type of candy and ice-cream. He would bought himself some cigars which was placed behind the counter. A day before the coming of Festival of 'Tung Zhi', together we made the 'Tang Yuan', after that we would pray to the idol of god and to the sky for he was a Buddhist. He would hold our hands with his big and warm hands and prayed for us. Every year I would get new colour pencils from him which was really pleased me for the whole holiday and I would keep them very carefully in my bag until the kindergarten reopened. For some of the holiday, he came to visit us at my house with grandma, he would sit silently beside my piano and listened while I was practicing the songs that made my fingers jerked sometimes, I knew it wasn't nice but he never complained it, he would just remained silent there, at the seat...

Remorse, I had never celebrate birthday for gonggong. Just a few days ago when popo showed me his I/C and realized that his birthday was actually on 8th Nov.

I really miss gonggong...... he told me not to cry during the last visit but I couldn't help myself, if I knew that was the last time, I would hold his hand even longer. To fulfil what I've promised to him, that's the only I could do for him.

It's time to say goodbye to our beloved granddad,
Go in Peace......

We love you......

No comments: